Parenting experts have long failed in assisting the parents in the world to totally eliminate the temper tantrums of their children. One of the primary reasons this has occurred is that the vast majority of parenting experts are very misguided and do not comprehend the true causes of temper tantrums. These parenting professionals tell us parents that the actual causes of children's temper tantrums are their determination to get what they want, their low ability to tolerate frustration, their inability to solve problems, their need for attention, their lack of ability to express themselves in words, and their inability to get out their emotions any other way-all of which, we're told, naturally leads children to experiment with tantrums.
I have discovered myself that these things aren't the real causes of tantrums. But they are the actual causes of the initial anger that leads to the tantrums. Repeatedly, over a twenty-three-year period, I have shown that if children's initial anger invokes the kind of responses they need from parents, the anger quickly goes away and does not develop into tantrums. One actual cause of temper tantrums is parents not meeting the children's initial anger needs.
Children who don't consistently get their anger needs met learn to trust that likelihood and become predisposed to quickly escalate into tantrums. However, children who do consistently get their anger needs met learn to trust that likelihood and become predisposed to not quickly escalate into tantrums. Tantrums are consistently prevented by demonstrating to children that their anger is understood and that it will consistently get the right response.
I gained this understanding of proper anger responses through personal experience. My first five kids all threw temper tantrums. My last eight didn't. When my fifth baby was fourteen months and I learned how to improve my responses to his anger, he stopped throwing temper tantrums within a week or so. I then used my improved anger responses with my last eight children, from the time they were born, and it prevented all tantrums with them, for the duration of their entire childhoods.
I named my techniques Infant Anger Management partly because they can be easily used to teach even newborn infants never to throw temper tantrums. When parents give up their faulty ideas they've been taught about the causes of temper tantrums and learn the functional techniques that eliminate and prevent them, there won't be any temper tantrums left.
I have discovered myself that these things aren't the real causes of tantrums. But they are the actual causes of the initial anger that leads to the tantrums. Repeatedly, over a twenty-three-year period, I have shown that if children's initial anger invokes the kind of responses they need from parents, the anger quickly goes away and does not develop into tantrums. One actual cause of temper tantrums is parents not meeting the children's initial anger needs.
Children who don't consistently get their anger needs met learn to trust that likelihood and become predisposed to quickly escalate into tantrums. However, children who do consistently get their anger needs met learn to trust that likelihood and become predisposed to not quickly escalate into tantrums. Tantrums are consistently prevented by demonstrating to children that their anger is understood and that it will consistently get the right response.
I gained this understanding of proper anger responses through personal experience. My first five kids all threw temper tantrums. My last eight didn't. When my fifth baby was fourteen months and I learned how to improve my responses to his anger, he stopped throwing temper tantrums within a week or so. I then used my improved anger responses with my last eight children, from the time they were born, and it prevented all tantrums with them, for the duration of their entire childhoods.
I named my techniques Infant Anger Management partly because they can be easily used to teach even newborn infants never to throw temper tantrums. When parents give up their faulty ideas they've been taught about the causes of temper tantrums and learn the functional techniques that eliminate and prevent them, there won't be any temper tantrums left.
About the Author:
Learn more about the causes of temper tantrums withThe real causes of tantrums . Visit Leanna Rae Scott's site to learn how to prevent temper tantrums.
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